ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment.
The candles are outnumbering the years you've got left.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- Clear-coding means stating your intentions up front. Hers was "I have a hard stop…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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