ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 14 FEBRUARY 1958
You swore you'd never sound like your parents.
You just said "because I said so" in your dad's exact voice. He lives in you now.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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