ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Treat yourself, they said.
You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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