ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You are a brief arrangement of atoms that learned to worry about emails.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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