ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English.
It will be only Monday every week for the rest of your working life.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- You are a brief arrangement of atoms that learned to worry about emails.
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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