ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands.
It will be the most productive minute of the quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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