ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every relationship has a honeymoon period.
Yours was the walk from the bar to the taxi rank. She got in alone.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- Underconsumption core is a beautiful aesthetic. It's what the last week of the month…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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