ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“I'm here for the right reasons.”
The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a fake tan.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You are a valued member of the team. So was the last person in…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
- Every relationship has a honeymoon period. Yours was the walk from the bar to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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