ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The in-office lunch is optional.
The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is writing down who didn't come. Then who did, but looked replaceable.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment. The candles are outnumbering the years…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- You "work best under pressure". You don't. You just only work under pressure.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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