ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up.
Eleven kilometres later you'd caught three pigeons, a cold and a physio waiting list that will outlive the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- When you're gone, the one who misses you most will be the algorithm. It…
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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