ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 11 DECEMBER 1970
Move fast and break things.
You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your sleep. Series A next.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Till death do us part. Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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