ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone.
Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do Not Answer".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- The documentary is unfiltered. It took seven people to remove the filter.
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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