ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“I'm here for the right reasons.”
The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a fake tan.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Clear-coding means stating your intentions up front. Hers was "I have a hard stop…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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