ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Parenting is ten percent love
and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is. Then they leave and take both.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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