ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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