ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise.
One of you will die first. It'll still be pending.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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