ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your back now goes out when you sneeze.
It goes out more than you do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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