ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 13 JANUARY 1978
You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to something.
They haven't. They've committed to watching your stories within four seconds and replying to nothing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- They're on a comeback tour. It's the fourth. They have never been anywhere long…
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- You are a valued member of the team. So was the last person in…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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