ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 16 SEPTEMBER 1979
Your resting heart rate is excellent.
It's had nothing else to do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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