ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 17 SEPTEMBER 1979
The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see my screen?"
You can. You always will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- You bought 41 games in the Steam sale. You will play two. The other…
- Not all who wander are lost. You are. The map gave up.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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