ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You said "that's so me" about a horoscope.
It also described 600 million other people and a goldfish.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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