ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Find your purpose.
It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key to a flat you'll never live in again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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