ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Coffee doesn't fix Monday.
It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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