ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You "work best under pressure".
You don't. You just only work under pressure.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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