ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 1 APRIL 1992
The house will be tidy again one day.
The day they move out. Tidy, silent, and you'll hate every inch of it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- You manifested your dream job. The universe received the request, checked your CV and…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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