ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 5am routine went viral.
You did it once, filmed it, and have slept until 11 every day since. The algorithm doesn't know. Your landlord does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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