ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Find your purpose.
It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key to a flat you'll never live in again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Your complaint has been escalated. It is now ignored by someone more senior.
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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