ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch.
Quiet budgeting is going anyway, checking your balance in the car and moving retirement to 79.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- AI agrees with you more than any human ever has. That's not wisdom. That's…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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