ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care.
It's been delivered. It's been read. It is now the most caring thing anyone has ever ignored.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Your complaint has been escalated. It is now ignored by someone more senior.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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