ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 19 AUGUST 1994
Wildflowering means letting the relationship grow naturally, with no timeline.
It has the growth rate of a fern in a windowless bathroom, and about the same future.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Your soft launch was a hand in a photo. The hard launch never came.…
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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