ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see my screen?"
You can. You always will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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