ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your resting heart rate is excellent.
It's had nothing else to do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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