ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
True love is choosing the same person every day.
They're choosing, daily, whether to mention your chewing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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