ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "chronically online".
Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have a loading icon.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.