ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 1 JANUARY 2002
Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question".
Zack has read your ideas. Zack would like them escorted from the building.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- Your soft launch was a hand in a photo. The hard launch never came.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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