ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life.
Someone will close them after the funeral. Unread.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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