ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 21 APRIL 2011
You got a houseplant to "take care of something".
It died. Even the plant had better boundaries than you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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