ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise.
One of you will die first. It'll still be pending.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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