ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "manifesting abundance".
The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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