ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 27 AUGUST 2011
Beach body ready?
The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't waiting for you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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