ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime.
They said that last time. Your lifetime is very important.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- You put "entrepreneur" in your bio. You've sold one pair of trainers on Vinted…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year. Nobody noticed…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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