ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 28 MARCH 2019
Start the week strong.
Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a buffering icon.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- Disrupt the industry. The industry will disrupt you back, then buy your logo for…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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