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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION SATURDAY, 6 JUNE 2020
Your call is important to us.
Not important enough to answer, but important.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. You don't have a type. You have a pattern. Your friends have a group…
  2. Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
  3. Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
  4. Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
  5. Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
  6. Your inbox reached zero once. The server was down. You were briefly free and…
  7. Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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