ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your thirties are your twenties with consequences.
The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports straight to your liver.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your inbox reached zero once. The server was down. You were briefly free and…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Wildflowering means letting the relationship grow naturally, with no timeline. It has the growth…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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