ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your company's core values are printed on the wall.
So nobody has to have them.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You don't have a type. You have a pattern. Your friends have a group…
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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