ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The customer is always right.
The customer is also on hold, forever, which is exactly how the company likes it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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