ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been quiet".
You weren't. You were just talking to nobody.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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