ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your favourite music is now called "a classic".
So are you. It means old.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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