ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "healing your inner child".
Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult that hasn't opened a letter since March.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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