ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You left them on read "to be mysterious".
They didn't notice. They were also being mysterious. You're now two mysteries who will never speak again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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